Yes,I am an army wife and therefore yes, many of my posts are related to things I face and experience as one...trust me, they are a lot. I sound perturbed? Well,I am! I just experienced what I call as a 'Freaky Friday of Fauj!' All you sisters-in-arms must have understood and are possibly shaking your head in sympathy while the 'civilian'(the term is ridiculous) ones must be scratching their heads.
Let me help you out though I am so irritated right now that your confusion is giving me sadistic pleasure. It is a common routine,common I say,not a rule, that postings are released on Fridays. Last Friday, my Mr.Army-man was intimated his. Now you must be inquisitive as to why Friday?
The people in the mysterious branch that is responsible shall feign ignorance at this or probably just dismiss it as a vague co-incidence but it seems to be a pretty common phenomena, too common for a coincidence! To me, it has some rationale similar to the cops taking in an accused on Friday nights to delay bail over the weekend. OK,maybe it is my super-paranoid, highly frustrated mind that is over-reacting but then there is some iota of truth in the 'Freaky Fridays'.
Well, the orders have come and now begins the debate- what about me? What about the kiddo? No, don't say that I must have known what I was signing on for when I wedded the olive greens. Of course, but you cannot comprehend the experience of going through the phase. It is difficult.
Venting out helps,people say so all you nice people listen up...
Post Fridaytic Stress Disorder
This is the name of the syndrome I am going through right now. So what if I made it up? It sounds so apt!
Just like grief response, I went into denial first. It just felt like a hearsay, a dream maybe. It is barely two years since the last one came. The fact that it was unexpected made it worse.
Why us? There are so many who get peace postings, one after the other, take .....for example(name hidden for whatever reasons) It is just two years, why so soon? The whole world is flawed....
with whom? God of course! Please get it cancelled God! Everyone knows it requires nothing less than a miracle for that to happen but what the heck! One can always try!
This is the part where a supposedly strong,made of iron will (well, I am none) army wife sinks into depression thinking of the lonely times ahead. Trust me at a time like this, you see no glory.
This is where I guess I will probably accept the fact and take over a responsible role of being a father and mother to my daughter and bid a proud farewell to my soldier.
That is what rationale suggests and I even started right; from first stage to the second, then third and moving on to fourth...something happened then. Instead of moving on to stage no.5, I am hopping between 2,3 and 4.
Maybe I need a friend, maybe a shrink..Hell, I just need my husband but that's not an option so I guess I will have to work it out.
As a responsible army wife, I must stay true to my image and remain positive about the whole thing. So let me give up the gloomy face and show you the bright side.
The advantages of moving to various places:
- The favorite phrase of 'senior army wives' is,' Army teaches you what you never thought of knowing' with an air of superiority. It sure has taught me how to be a packing wizard. In case medicine and writing don't work out, I definitely have a career as 'packers & movers' to fall back to.
- I get to see many places. Who travels otherwise,right? And it is truly great to see places no one has even heard of literally! Every time hubby announces the name of the place he is moving to, I have to Google it. Pretty amazing?
- I don't need to stick to one job even if it sucks 'coz we move anyways, every couple of years. I have the option of changing it though it has to be a huge quirk of fate to get a great offer that comes God-sent at the very time you need it.
- I never have a cluttered house. Oh not because I am some amazing home-manager. It is because every time we move, at least 15% of the stuff gets damaged. Sadly, I am very fond of pottery- a liking I gave up the last time we moved as nothing survived.
-I never have a routine I can get bored of. I am constantly on the move, trying to settle down at times and winding up everything on others. The in-between times are just fleeting moments.
Well, to cut the long story short- I have survived 'Freaky Fridays'(there are so many f words I want to associate along with it) and I know I will survive this one too. All my friends and family who are worried right now, don't be!(okay a little maybe, feels good to me) I am going to be just fine!
Being in love with a guy in the army is a very unique feeling- not the best, not the worst either. It is something that cannot be explained or understood...just experienced! I chose the guy of my dreams...the love of my life...his job and everything else well, is just part of the package I guess.
It just is a shout-out to those who don't know that army-wives may have wills of steel, they too feel and the brave face they put up hides many a turmoils within. If you understand, Thank you! If you don't, please don't say,' You must be prepared. After all, you married an army guy'.
For the likes of me, this is a message of solidarity. We all face the same doubts,dilemmas and heartaches in this sweet and sour role of being a soldier's wife. It is okay to not be okay all the time! More importantly, it is important to be nice to each other- especially to those supposedly 'below'. You were there too once, remember?